Game Recap: Sox-Jays, Game 2

After his first two Big League starts were very repsectable, LHP Marc Rzepczynski got his first win MLB win. Yesterday's performance was similar to his other two starts: 6.0IP, 4H, 1ER, 4BB, and 4K—another quality start, keeping his QS to GS ratio at a perfect 1.000. In total he threw 109 pitches where 59 of those where for strikes; he his still struggling a little at finding the strike zone and, although he's striking batters out—8.00 K/9 over 3 three starts—his walks have gotten him into some trouble—5.50 BB/9 over his last three starts. Also, over his three starts only 58.4% of his pitches where strikes. Comparing this number to the other Jays starters, Halladay (68.7%), Tallet (60.4%), Romero (60.8%), and Richmond (60.8%), if he could get that number up a bit, he could dominate deeper into games. That being said, he's currently averaging just about 103 pitches per start, which I find to be impressive for a kid who has spent most of this time in New Hampshire this season.

Adam Lind continued his great offensive season with a homerun and a pair of RBIs. Scott Rolen had another great day at the plate going 2-3 with a walk and scored two runs. He also added another gem to his already long highlight real when he robbed JD Drew of a base hit on a liner near second (Rolen was player over in the shift). Overbay also had a good day at the plate, going 2-4 and scored once. It's slightly disturbing to me that trade rumours involving Rolen and Overbay are swirling around, especially since it seems like Boston is interested in Rolen to replace Lowell who has been struggling with injury. Hopefully Rolen didn't showcase his talent too well yesterday.

Vernon Wells sat out his second straight game with what head athletic trainer George Poulis described as violently explosive diarrhea. I really don't mind the outfield looking like Bautista-Rios-Lind, not at all. Although, Delucci has been playing good defence lately, but he injured his foot—x-rays came back negative—during the first game of the series. His bat has been absolutely attrocious though.

Today's game should be a pitching gem: Halladay versus Lester. This is the first of three starts that Halladay will probably have before the July 31st no waiver trade deadline.

Vernon Wells: and you thought his offence was bad.

The boys at Mopupduty.com show that Wells ranks worst among CF in the MLB.

Vernon’s UZR/150 (zone rating over 150 games) is an MLB CF worst -31.9. To put this into perspective a few players are tied for second down at -12ish... Wells’ fielding has cost the Jays 21.3 runs vs an average fielder this season. This is second worst in the MLB, only -0.3 less than Adam Dunn’s -21.6 fielding runs.

My fucking God! Sweet fucking Jesus! Adam Dunn?

Christ.

The article is worth a read.



Update: Thanks to FanGraphs, I've tracked down the complete fielding number for CFs in the MLB:

Team	UZR/150
Blue Jays	-29.6
Braves	-13.2
Orioles	-12.8
Phillies	-12.4
Indians	-11.5
Nationals	-10.4
Red Sox	-9.7
Mets	-8.3
Diamondbacks	-6.9
Astros	-4.8
Rockies	-4.1
Angels	-4.1
Twins	-3.2
Cubs	0.7
Pirates	1.7
Tigers	1.7
Marlins	1.8
Rays	3.4
Padres	4.1
Brewers	5.9
White Sox	7
Rangers	7.7
Giants	8
Reds	8.8
Dodgers	10.5
Yankees	10.9
Royals	11.1
Athletics	14.3
Cardinals	21
Mariners	21.3

For all CF, the average UZR/150 is +0.3. Vernon Wells carries a z-score of -2.66; statistically he performs much worse than the average CF.

Shawn Marcum AA rehab start

This is very good news, indeed.

Shawn Marcum made the start last night in a AA pitching duel between the Fisher Cats and the Connecticut Defenders. The Cats whet on to win 1-0 (boxscore). Marcum himself had a very solid outting:

	IP	H	R	ER	BB	SO	HR	ERA
Marcum	4.2	3	0	0	2	4	0	0.00

Although he only pitched 4.2, he only gave up three hits on 19 batters faced.

Before this start, Marcum had made two rehab starts with Dunedin, only going a total of 6 innings over both. The Jays are slowly testing his arm; the fact that he only made two starts in HiA before going up to AA might mean that we could see him in the Big Leagues this season.

Since '05 Marcum's fastball has fallen from an average of 89.4 mph to 86.8 last year. Hopefully, in enough time, he can touch 90mph again

Vernon Wells: by the numbers

Vernon Wells has under produced this season—plain and simple. In December of '06, the club signed him to a huge extension worth $126M over 7 years; at the time it was the 7th largest contract in MLB history. Details of the contract break down as follows:

Year	Salary ($M)
2009	10
2010	21
2011	23
2012	21
2013	21
2014	21

There are also performance bonuses:

250K	MVP
200K	World Series MVP
150K	ALCS MVP
100K	Most votes in all-star balloting

The contract also includes a full no-trade clause and Wells has the option of opting out after the 2011 season (not bloody likely at this rate).

Offensively, Vernon Wells is in the lineup to produce runs, and this is something that he has not done. Through 84 games, he has hit just .167 (15-90) with runners in scoring position, has only 9 dingers and 38 RBIs. Wells is also struggling when he is down in the count, hitting only .205 with two strikes—he loves to chase that slider down and away and every pitcher seems to throw it at him. Wells' struggle reached a unprecedented level when Cito—the stingiest litmus test for loosing confidence in a hitter—moved him from the cleanup spot to 6th in the lineup.

I'd like to push my frustrations to the side and take a purely objective view of Wells' production this season and compare him to the other CFs in the league. The only way to do this is using number: statistics and sabermetrics. Good thing I love numbers. Here's a list of the qualified CFs this year, sorted based on 2009 salary:

RK	PLAYER	TEAM	HR	RBI	BA	OPS	RC	BB/K	Salary
1	Carlos Beltran	NYM	8	40	0.336	0.952	53.2	1.09	19,243,682
2	Torii Hunter	LAA	17	65	0.305	0.938	59.2	0.65	18,000,000
3	Kosuke Fukudome	CHC	7	27	0.26	0.811	41.7	0.87	12,500,000
4	Vernon Wells	TOR	9	38	0.261	0.721	46.1	0.64	10,000,000
5	Mike Cameron	MIL	14	41	0.259	0.84	50.6	0.62	10,000,000
6	Aaron Rowand	SFO	9	40	0.293	0.819	47.3	0.3	9,600,000
7	Grady Sizemore	CLE	13	47	0.229	0.768	38.3	0.54	4,766,666
8	Curtis Granderson	DET	18	43	0.254	0.794	54.9	0.58	3,500,000
9	Shane Victorino	PHI	6	42	0.314	0.851	63.4	0.9	3,125,000
10	Marlon Byrd	TEX	8	44	0.283	0.799	42	0.34	3,060,000
11	Nate McLouth	ATL/PIT	14	49	0.267	0.817	49.9	0.61	2,500,000
12	Cody Ross	FLA	14	49	0.278	0.833	48	0.33	2,225,000
13	Chris Young	ARI	6	25	0.198	0.661	29.8	0.44	1,950,000
14	Willy Taveras	CIN	1	11	0.238	0.575	25	0.36	1,500,000
15	Melky Cabrera	NYY	8	33	0.278	0.771	35.3	0.67	1,400,000
16	Matt Kemp	LAD	11	50	0.324	0.892	62	0.46	467,000
17	Franklin Gutierrez	SEA	10	37	0.297	0.809	42.9	0.43	455,000
18	Jacoby Ellsbury	BOS	5	28	0.301	0.755	50.9	0.69	449,500
19	B.J. Upton	TAM	7	33	0.246	0.721	47.2	0.45	435,000
20	Adam Jones	BAL	12	47	0.308	0.851	53.8	0.34	435,000
21	Michael Bourn	HOU	3	25	0.289	0.775	53.7	0.53	434,500
22	Ryan Sweeney	OAK	3	21	0.269	0.675	27	0.53	414,000
23	Dexter Fowler	COL	3	21	0.256	0.732	40.7	0.58	401,000
24	Colby Rasmus	STL	11	34	0.281	0.815	40.9	0.29	400,000

Most headings in the above should be familiar expect maybe for a couple: OPS (On-base plus slugging) which measures a player's ability to get on base and hit for powers; and RC (Runs created) which is an estimate of the number of runs a player contributes to his team. The modern formula takes many statistics into account, and is quite accurate (usually within %5) of the actual number.

Wells ranks as the 4th highest paid CF in the Bigs, with Beltran well in the lead and a relatively large grouping of players at the bottom end making less then $1M. The average salary for Big League CFs is $4,25M; Wells is over double that this year.

What's interesting to observe is the trend in salary:


The above plot shows CFs (ranked from lowest paid to highest paid) and their salaries. The results was not all that surprising for me: the trend was clearly exponential—the solid red line shows an exponential fit to the data points (For those number junkies, the actual trend line follows the function,

Salary = (149121)(exp{[rank]/4.89}) - 38885

If you don't understand what that means, then you're not a number junkie).

Basically, what the trend line shows is what a CF should make based on his salary rank. Points on the red line indicate that a player is making what he should for his rank, dots to the left of the line indicate that a player is making more than he should based on the trend, and dots on the right of the line indicate that a player is making less than he should based on the trend. Take a look at Wells (highlighted in blue): he is to the left of the line and thus is currently making more than the trend for CFs.

Here's where Wells ranks in all the above stats:

	HR	RBI	BA	OPS	RC	BB/K	Salary
Rank	12	13	16	20	14	7	4

One could make the fair assumption that if Vernon is making the 4th highest CF salary, then he should rank around 4th in all categories. He clearly does not. In fact, he ranks well below 4th in all stats that I've shown.

However, since the trend in salaries is not linear, maybe it's unfair to look at these statistics in a purely linear sense. Well, for this we need slightly more intense statistics (don't worry, this won't be too rough): z-score. Basically the z-score quantifies how a number compares to the average (technically it is the number of standard deviations from the mean); a high z-score means that a value is much higher than the average, and a very negative z-score means that a number is well below the average. Here are Wells' z-scores:

	HR	RBI	BA	OPS	RC	BB/K	Salary
Wells	-0.01	0.08	-0.47	-0.82	0.01	0.44	0.98

Wells has a salary much above the average (z-score of 0.98) for CFs. One would would then hope that his performance in statistical categories is about this z-score as well. It is not. He is near average in 3 of 6 statistical categories (HR, RBI, RC). He's above average in only BB/K. The bad new is that he's well below the average in BA and OPS: two massively important categories for someone who the Jays reply on for his ability to get on base and drive runs in.

Compare these numbers to Beltran's:

	HR	RBI	BA	OPS	RC	BB/K	Salary
Beltran	-0.23	0.24	1.89	1.91	0.71	2.68	2.71

Compared to the average salary for CFs ($4.25M), Beltran makes a shitload more ($19.24M), which is represented by the high z-score in that category (2.71). However, as opposed to Wells, Beltran also has high z-scores in RBI, BA, OPS, RC and BB/K; not quite 2.71 in those categories, but they're up there.

What does this all mean?

Well, according to the salary trend for this year, Vernon is overpaid for his rank. He also ranks below his salary rank in all 6 categories. Using a statistical approach, Wells is under performing; his z-scores rank below his salary in all 6 categories.

Now, let's remember that this is based on this 2009 salary. That all goes even more to shit when you consider he'll make $21M next year, then $23M the year after that. Oh, but there is hope the he might opt-out of his clearly inflated contract in 2011? Not a chance at this rate.

Conclusion: Vernon Wells is more of a fucking useless piece of shit than I thought. Numbers don't lie.

The only bright spot in a potential Halladay trade would be if they could package Wells and his ridiculous (or maybe even half) contract.

Game Recap: Jays-Orioles, Game 3.

The Jays suffered another disappointing loss yesterday to the fucking Orioles; they lost the series 1-2 and go into the all-star break two games below .500 at (44-46). With a win by the Red Sox, the Jays now fall to 11.0 GB in the ALE: below the Medosa Line I created for myself last week.

That's it. I've officially lost hope on this season. Let's now all pray that JP doesn't completely fuck all hopes for next season. With all of these trade rumors about Halladay floating around, who knows what will happen. Am I against the Jays trading away the number one pitcher in baseball? Absolutely not. Although Halladay is signed through next season, I ask myself, what is the probability that we get to resign him past 2010? Not good. If that's the case, we might as well get some damn good tier fucking A+++++ prospects that are damn well near Major League ready.

It hurts me to think of Halladay in any uniform other than the Jays', but this is 'big picture' stuff. Do they Jays have a chance at the post season next year? Somewhat. With all these young arms coming back from the DL (Marcum, McGowan, Litch), other young arms who have proven that they at least deserve a shot at a legitimate spot in the Bigs (Romero, Rzepczynski, Ray), consistency might be a big issue next year; I'd put their chances of the playoffs in 2010 somewhere around 20-30% and that's with Roy. So, do we keep him around and probably loose him about the '10 season, or do we deal him when he's ripe for the pickin' and get something good in return? I tend toward the latter, but we better get an unbelievable package in return.

I think all Jays' fans are going to have to come to terms with one obvious fact: we will not get fair value for Halladay, in a strict linear dollar-for-dollar sense. No team has or would be willing to give up the number of prospects and players that would equal to Roy's true value (this article explains this concept quite well). In my opinion, something really good—not excellent, as what Halliday would be truly worth—is better than nothing.

Back to yesterday's game and a more positive note. Rzepczynski had another very good start. Here's the line on his outing:

IP	H	R	ER	HR	BB	SO	GSc	DEC	ERA
6	5	3	3	1	3	5	52	L(0-1)	3.00

He's now 2-2 for Quality Starts, but unfortunately his record is 0-1 as the bats just haven't been there to back him up. He still struggled a bit with control with a pitches-strikes count of 94-59, which is marginally better than his first outing. If Mark can find the strike zone a little more, he'd be able to go longer into games, produce less walks (which have gotten him into trouble in both his outings), and probably produce a few more Ks. Take a look at the graph to the left; it shows the position of all balls, strikes and hits. There seems to be a lot of scatter on the left-hand side. The outing produced another respectable Game Score of 52.

This all looks very promising.

Game Scores Update: July 12. 2009

I'll be updating my game score calculations every Monday. I've added a few headings to my database which will track changes in Average Game Score (Chg AGSc) and Position, along with the number of starts a pitcher made in the week (starts). Today, no changes will be recorded (using today as the first entry).

Here's what we got. For the Jays' staff,

	AGSc	Chg	Starts	GS
Roy Halladay	60.24	+0.00	0	17
Marc Rzepczynski	59.50	+0.00	0	2
Ricky Romero	57.08	+0.00	0	13
Scott Richmond	55.00	+0.00	0	13
Robert Ray	48.50	+0.00	0	4
Brian Tallet	48.06	+0.00	0	17
Brett Cecil	43.63	+0.00	0	8
David Purcey	41.00	+0.00	0	5
Jesse Litch	37.00	+0.00	0	2
Brad Mills	25.00	+0.00	0	2

Rzepczynski, with a good start yesterday still remains high on the list, but with only 2 total starts. Halladay—even going winless since his return from the DL—remains at the top. Romero having pitched really well over the past month is sitting with a very respectable 57.

For notable pitchers in the MLB,

	Chg		AGSc	Chg	GS	Starts
1	+0	Dan Haren	67.83	+0.00	18	0
2	+0	Tim Lincecum	64.89	+0.00	18	0
3	+0	Zack Greinke	62.78	+0.00	18	0
4	+0	Chris Carpenter	61.69	+0.00	13	0
5	+0	Felix Hernandez	60.94	+0.00	18	0
6	+0	Javier Vazquez	60.56	+0.00	18	0
7	+0	Roy Halladay	60.24	+0.00	17	0
8	+0	Josh Johnson	59.47	+0.00	19	0
9	+0	Matt Cain	59.22	+0.00	18	0
10	+0	Yovani Gallardo	58.67	+0.00	18	0
11	+0	Justin Verlander	58.32	+0.00	19	0
12	+0	Jered Weaver	58.17	+0.00	18	0
13	+0	Chad Billingsley	57.37	+0.00	19	0
14	+0	Josh Becket	57.22	+0.00	18	0
15	+0	Adam Wainwright	57.16	+0.00	19	0
16	+0	Johan Santana	57.11	+0.00	18	0
17	+0	Jake Peavy	56.69	+0.00	13	0
18	+0	Wandy Rodriguez	56.33	+0.00	18	0
19	+0	Jon Lester	55.11	+0.00	18	0
20	+0	CC Sabathia	55.05	+0.00	19	0
21	+0	Jair Jurrjens	54.89	+0.00	19	0
22	+0	Carlos Zambrano	54.44	+0.00	16	0
23	+0	Roy Oswalt	54.16	+0.00	19	0
24	+0	A.J. Burnett	54.12	+0.00	17	0
25	+0	Dallas Braden	54.00	+0.00	18	0
26	+0	Kevin Millwood	53.84	+0.00	19	0
27	+0	Cliff Lee	53.32	+0.00	19	0
28	+0	Joel Pineiro	53.29	+0.00	17	0
29	+0	Mark Buehrle	53.11	+0.00	18	0
30	+0	Nick Blackburn	53.06	+0.00	18	0
31	+0	Doug Davis	52.53	+0.00	19	0
32	+0	Jason Marquis	52.00	+0.00	18	0
33	+0	Ryan Dempster	51.76	+0.00	17	0
34	+0	Tim Wakefield	49.53	+0.00	17	0
35	+0	Barry Zito	48.33	+0.00	18	0
36	+0	Derek Lowe	48.32	+0.00	19	0
37	+0	Kevin Slowey	47.63	+0.00	16	0
38	+0	Bronson Arroyo	47.29	+0.00	17	0

Cheers.

(Again, if there are any pitchers that you'd like to see added to the above list, just let me know.)

Game Score calculated.

Not being able to find a good database for game scores, I figure out a way to create one myself. Here is the average game score (AGSc) along with games started (GS) for the Jays' starters this season:

	AGSc	GS
Marc Rzepczynski	67.00	1
Roy Halladay	60.24	17
Ricky Romero	57.17	12
Scott Richmond	55.00	13
Robert Ray	48.50	4
Brian Tallet	48.06	17
David Purcey	41.00	5
Brett Cecil	40.29	7
Jesse Litch	37.00	2
Brad Mills	25.00	2

I have also created a database for a number of notable pitchers in the league. I used pitchers who had low ERAs, high Ks, high Ws and high QSs, and also included pitchers making the big coin.

1	Dan Haren	66.65	17
2	Tim Lincecum	64.89	18
3	Zack Greinke	62.78	18
4	Chris Carpenter	62.67	12
5	Felix Hernandez	60.94	18
6	Javier Vazquez	60.56	18
7	Roy Halladay	60.24	17
8	Yovani Gallardo	60.12	17
9	Matt Cain	59.82	17
10	Josh Johnson	59.39	18
11	Chad Billingsley	58.50	18
12	Jered Weaver	58.24	17
13	Justin Verlander	57.56	18
14	Adam Wainwright	56.89	18
15	Jake Peavy	56.69	13
16	Wandy Rodriguez	56.33	18
17	Johan Santana	56.29	17
18	CC Sabathia	55.94	18
19	Mark Buehrle	55.76	17
20	Josh Becket	55.41	17
21	Jair Jurrjens	54.94	18
22	Carlos Zambrano	54.40	15
23	Kevin Millwood	54.22	18
24	A.J. Burnett	54.12	17
25	Roy Oswalt	54.11	18
26	Dallas Braden	53.76	17
27	Doug Davis	53.67	18
28	Jon Lester	53.65	17
29	Nick Blackburn	53.53	17
30	Joel Pineiro	53.29	17
31	Cliff Lee	52.89	18
32	Jason Marquis	52.24	17
33	Ryan Dempster	51.76	17
34	Barry Zito	50.71	17
35	Tim Wakefield	49.53	17
36	Kevin Slowey	47.63	16
37	Derek Lowe	47.44	18
38	Bronson Arroyo	45.00	16

Interesting to see pitchers like Cliff Lee and Timmy "Lob Ball" Wakefield scoring so low in this category.

If there's anyone you'd like to me add to the list, let me know.

UPDATE: Added to following players, so now the list contains the 15 top paid starters this season:

Jake Peavy

Roy Oswalt

Ryan Dempster

Chris Carpenter

Bronson Arroyo

An interesting stat by which to rate starting pitchers

Rating the skill of a starting pitcher is very subjective. Many people look at the big three—Wins, ERA and Ks—in order to get an idea of how well a pitcher is doing. The clear problem is that wins are very reliant on the team as a whole. Also, a pitcher can record a high number of Ks, but still allow long balls, walks, run, et cetera. ERA is a bit better, but a starter can have a low ERA but not go very far into games, which would be an asset for any starter.

There's also the Baseball Writers of America system, whereby they use a random number generator to choose the best pitcher in the NL and AL at the end of each season.

I've always found Quality Starts (QS) to be a good way of rating a pitcher's performance, it has nothing to do with his team's performance but focuses only on a pitcher's performance and ability to go at least six innings into a start.

Recently, I read about a very interesting stat: Game Score. Game Score is designed to measure a starting pitcher's dominance over the game. It's much more in depth than QS, making it more complicated, but it takes a lot more into account. A pitcher starts the game with a "score" of 50. Points are then added or subtracted:

+1	Each out recorded
+2	Each inning completed after the 4th
+1	Each strikeout
-2	Each hit allowed
-4	Each earned run
-2	Each unearned run
-1	Each walk

Therefore, a high GS is good and a low GS is bad. Unfortunately, I can't find any database information for the GS of individual pitchers over the season, but FYI, the Jays currently sit 13th in the league with an average GS of 50.0 dead on. The Giants lead the majors with 54.6 and the Indians are bringing up the rear with 44.3.

UPDATE:

Today Halliday had a GS of 55; Price had a GS of 62.

I'm going to try and keep track of the GS for Jays' pitchers after each game.

The Mendosa Limbo: how low can you go?

The brooms were out in Tampa Bay today as Halladay couldn't stop the sweep. The ALE has taught the Jays a lesson over the past two series and they're 2-8 over their last 10. The Jays now sit 9.5 back of Boston, 9 games back of the second place Yankees and 4.5 games behind the Rays to sit in 4th place in the division. Before the season started, in no way did I expect the Jays to be playoff contenders. Although, April and May did give me so hope that they wouldn't be this far back a week before the All-Star Game—here we are.

No matter what, I'll always be a Jays' fan and I'll watch as many games as I possibly can. The question is, at what point do we dedicated fans neatly file away our hope under 2010? I am personally setting the "Jays' Mendosa Line" at 10.1 GB: if the Jays at any point get to over ten games back, I will officially lose hope in a good season. By "good season" I mean hope that come September, the Jays will be flirting with a wild card spot. They don't have to be in the wild card spot, I just want a little drama—4 games out would be just fine.

Alright, so when the Jays reach the > 10 GB milestone, then what? I'm throwing my hope toward another team. The question is, what team? Well, it sure as hell won't be anyone from the AL, which leads to the NL. Allow me to very quickly eliminate a few teams: Not the fucking Cardinals, because fuck them; not the fucking Dodgers, because that team shits in the same toilets as Manny "my balls are tiny" Ramirez ; and not the fucking Philles because of '93. So there go the current division leaders. I'm not jumping on some retarded bandwagon.

I obviously don't want to start cheering for a team that's in a situation like the Jays, which eliminates a few more teams: Washington (duh), Pittsburgh, Arizona and San Diego. Of the teams are left, I've narrowed it down to three: The Cubs, The Astros and The Mets. Why?

The Mets (40-43)—They've got a really solid team. Question is, are they going to get healthy soon enough? With Delgado on the long term DL and Putz, Reyes, and Beltran on the short term DL, they're missing a good chuck of change. Sitting at 4.5 back of the Phillies in the NLE, they're in tough, but they still have a very legitimate chance of the division or the WC.

The Cubs(41-41)—There's something about their starting rotation. I really like Zambrano; he's done wonders for me in my fantasy league. Former Jay Ted Lilly is having a great season in the number two spot. Rookie Randy Wells is having a great season. Rich Harden is probably their worst starter and is having a very inconsistent season (dropped the son-of-a-bitch from my fantasy team), but he could straighten out at any time. They currently sit 3.5 back of the division leading Cardinals.

The Astros (41-43)—Having starters Roy Oswalt and Wandy Rodriguez, closer Jose Valverde, and position players Michael Bourn and Miguel Tajada on my fantasy team, I've taken advantage of the mlb.tv feature which allows me to switch to games when my players are hitting or pitching. So, over the past few weeks, I've taken in a lot of Huston Astros baseball. They are just simply fun to watch: they've got power, speed and pitching. It's great baseball. They currently sit 4.5 back of the Cardinals in the NLC

For now, I'm not really leaning more toward any of the three. I'm going to continue to watch them on mlb.tv and see how they do.

It really fucking pisses me off to think that if they Jays were in the NLE or NLC as my above group of three, they'd be in serious contention for the post season. Fuck you Bud Selig.

That's one big fucking $15 million mozza ball

I missed most of the Jays' game yesterday, as I got home from work at around 9:30 ast. As soon as I got home, I immediately turned on the ball game and logged onto mlb.com. My eyes went wide as I saw the news, " Blue Jays release struggling Ryan; I just about shit a fucking brick. I then proceeded to dance around the apartment praising God, Jesus, Alla, the fucking devil; basically anyone who'd fucking listen—Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead!

So it cost them $15 million? Finally, money well spent I say. I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when interim president and CEO Paul Beeston had to walk into the Rogers' executive offices and ask for the money:

Beeston: So yeah, I'm going to need some money.

Rogers: Did Jose Bautista kill another group of strippers again? Fuck—he really has to stop doing that.

Beeston: Well yeah, but we're just blaming that shit on Mulliniks now. But seriously, we're going to need $15 million and fast.

Rogers: ...

Beeston: Remember when we made BJ Ryan the highest paid reliever in the League? Yeah. Not working out so well for us. We'd really like to get him the fuck out of here.

Rogers: Cash or cheque?

$15 million to send Ryan packing, that's a fucking bargain at double the price. Christ, I'd lick the inside of his jockstrap too, if that's what it took.

Reading what the club management had to say about the release is goddamn priceless. They called him the "12th man on the pitching staff. Gaston also said that he had been considering using Ryan only in "blowout situations." No shit. Considering Hayhurst has been doing well and Downs's boo-boo on his big toe (read as yeast infection in his massive vagina) is now all better, what options did they have?

Best day ever.